70’s Gold

Schoolgirl Report 3

“What parents find unthinkable” according to the subtitle of the third installment in the Schoolgirl Report series, you might find unfathomable. Vicious scenes of senseless brutality and sexploitation on a hyper-inflated scale await in what originally began as an innocent look at the purported teenage sexual habits in 1970s Germany.

Marketed as actual documentaries of German youth, volumes one and two of what became a sensation internationally recounted the supposed real tales of Teutonic teenage skylarking in flashback form. Interspersed between the stories of delicate young flowers being corrupted by peers and authority figures were man-on-the-street interviews, which gave you glimpses into the direction the prevailing moral winds were blowing among the common folk.

Now, it doesn’t take too long to figure out that the whole she-bang is a put-on and not to be taken too seriously. Adding to the nostalgic feel of the films are long-haired co-eds prancing around in groovy get-ups and bulky underwear, flaunting poofy pubes and tat-less extremities all to Gerd Wilden’s crazy soundtracks that fall somewhere between Austin Powers and Esquivel. But, while the third volume of this seemingly light-hearted trip through time makes use of the same conventions, it takes a rather disturbing turn with its overtly gratuitous portrayals of forcible sex and its rather cringe-inducing fantasy scenarios. To make things even more perturbing, some of the girls don’t seem to fall into that, “I’m really 24, but if I put my hair in pigtails I can pass myself off as borerline illegal” territory. At times you really do wonder how these producers were able to get parents/guardians/adults who should know better to look the other way. Granted, none of it is overzealously graphic, easily falling under the soft-core banner, with feigned penetration and the like, but these are mighty gritty themes to be tossing about in any format, let alone to pass them off as commonplace sexual occurrences in the minds and lives of an underage populous too young to understand the ramifications of such actions.

The film is entirely in German, so it may be easier to gloss over some of scenarios and focus more on the cute young girls and their gorgeous bodies. But while some things are better left unsaid, other things may have been better un-filmed. If you are particularly sensitive to very extreme imagery, whether explicitly on display or, as it is in this case, implied, you might be better off watching the first two films in the series.

Though the producers strayed perhaps a bit too far from their original intent, this series remains one of the all-time titillating relics of the sexploitation era. As always, reserve judgment until after you watch it for yourself. Just don’t say we didn’t warn you.

 

Stars:   Sonja Spitzweg Johannes Buzalski

Categories: Euro Teen Classic International All Sex Schoolgirls 70’s Gold

Running Time:   80 minutes

Released:   03/1972

Studio Name:   Impulse

Series:   Schoolgirl Report

Director:   Ernst Hofbauer Walter Boos

Back Door Brides

Wedding days are generally described as the happiest day in a young woman’s life. The question is: which woman?

In the case of Back Door Brides, the bride-to-be is making gigantic mistake tying the knot with her fiancé and she knows it. It seems to be, in fact, her bridesmaids that are having the best time of it all, getting their jollies on with a bevy of handsome and horny groomsmen. Then again, once the bride escapes the clutches of her new hubby and does a bit of consummating by proxy with some of the other boys in attendance, her mood seems to perk right up.

Sam (Harry Reems) and Helen (Barbie Blake) steal away from the reception to get away from the crush of the crowd. After a brief introduction, they are playing suck face on the pool table in the parlor room. What’s most fascinating is the social progression that takes place in porn films. This particular chance meeting went sort of like this:

Sam: Crowded in there, eh?

Helen: Sure is.

*Face in pussy*

As the two get it on, Terry Perry interrupts, though it’s not really interrupting if the two want her to join in for a threesome. Reems porks Brittany while Barbie works over her giant tits. Then the girls engage in 69 with Barbie on top. Reems hits Barbie’s ass in doggie as Barbie licks Brittany’s pussy.

Meanwhile, Keli Richards and Ashley Van Sloan are two other bridesmaids who are burning up from the heat. The most likely explanation, however, is that they are wearing too much chiffon and polyester. And no, it’s not from Ron Jeremy whose efforts to woo the women fail miserably. They escape to the bathroom to cool off and to get away from Ron, but end up in the bedroom instead where the heat gets turned up even further. Keli burrows her way into Ashley’s behind, but gets no further when a drunk Ron Jeremy barges in and makes another play on the girls. They try some half-assed refusals, but they’re too horny to resist or to care at this point. They’ll take a threeway including some anal sex anyway they can get it, which they do.

Flash forward to the outdoor area near the altar. A very young Tom Byron and Marc Wallice are scheming to bed some bridesmaids. Marc, however, also has his eyes on the big prize: Brittany Stryker, the bride. Already soused beyond belief to calm her nerves, Brittany informs the two that the most exciting thing she’s ever seen out of her betrothed is an index finger , knuckle-deep in nostril, prospecting for snot nuggets. Obviously, she can be had for the right price and the right pitch, which the boys deliver. As she says, “She wasn’t born to be wild for nothing.” Tom gets his cock sucked while Marc completes the fingercuff by fucking Brittany from behind in doggie.

Barbie Blake and Terry Perry take pity on the shunned hubby and decide to make him feel better. They want every bit of his cum…merbund, tux and tie removed so they have a better angle to his cock. After double-teaming the newlywed, they lie supine on the couch. In an ironic twist, he jams one index finger each into their sopping, hairy pussies, eclipsing the nasal excavation project as his previous high level of excitement. Not only that, he’s one of the few guys in the film to befoul some chick’s asshole.

After a night of wild passion with everyone but themselves, the married couple awakes to find themselves side-by-side and naked on the couch. It’s high time they consummated their own marriage instead of consummating every other thing within the tri-county area. Once again, the groom (Rick Savage) goes for the tinier of the two holes, fucking his bride in the bum tunnel until they both climax from exhaustion.

BDB is campy and schlocky as are the bulk of classic porn titles. There are bad puns, one-liners and carrying on in mass quantities as you would expect. What you wouldn’t expect is the absence of perhaps the most critical part of the porn flick: the pop shot. The box cover description claims the film is a raunchy wedding celebration you won’t want to miss; the problem is that, in a porn sense, it sort of turns out that way. A porn flick without the pop shot is like a car without an engine – it never really gets started. Unfortunately, as fun as this wedding day romp may be, the lack of visible cumshots leaves this film somewhat wide of the mark.

As always, don’t take our word for it. Watch and decide for yourself.

Stars:   Brittany Stryker Dick Rambone Harry Reems Marc Wallice Keli Richards Rick Savage Barbie Blake Terry Perry Ashley Van Sloan Tom Byron Ron Jeremy

Categories: Feature Classic 70’s Gold

Running Time:   85 minutes

Released:   03/1986

Studio Name:   Paradise Visuals

Director:   Sid Shepard

Aphrodisiac: The Sexual Secret of Marijuana

Maybe at the onset of the 70s, when this documentary was made, the beneficial qualities of the marijuana plant were considered secrets to mainstream America. But to devotees of the feel-good recreational drug, those who understand that glaucoma, blue jeans with holes in the knees and layoffs at Frito-Lay could all be eradicated with legalization, its magical qualities have been known all along.

Released in 1971, Aphrodisiac: The Sexual Secret of Marijuana is a tribute to the plant that has caused more rifts in the political spectrum and more sex at college frat parties than any other in the history of existence. Originally released as a home video free of the sex parts, this particular version of the film is the uncut version. It features testimonials from marijuana users about the sexual benefits of the plant and shows them engaged in the throes of passion. Underlying the action is narration done by the standard golden-throated announcer, similar to those that used to grace those old war-era propaganda films.

While the presentation of facts, cultivation tips, use during wartime, food recipes and so on are true to life, the sex parts are not quite as explicit or as frequent as one might like in a porn film. Sure, it’s full-on nudity and penetration and such, but there are no money shots to be seen at any point. Granted, this isn’t really a porn film; it’s more of a documentary with some explicit sex scenes thrown in for good measure.

That said, a very young John Holmes makes an appearance as a business man who is working late on a presentation. His assistant breaks out the joint to help him focus and the result is a borderline spiritual experience instead of just down and dirty fucking.

Throughout the film, others too make their case why marijuana is so effective as a sexual stimulant. But, they all seem to be done tongue-in-cheek. For instance, while cheating on her husband at a party, a woman raves about the potency of hash while telling the story of how the guy she wanted to bang couldn’t get it up because he was loaded on alcohol.

“It’s the most beautiful sex I ever had,” says another woman. When she and her man toked up and got together her “vagina started burning” and “she wanted to suck him inside her and keep him there forever.” She should know because she’s a fiction writer. Hmmmm. Her conclusion: weed is the “greatest sexual stimulant since the 12-inch penis and a hell of a lot easier to find.”

Another guy claims his honeymoon was a disaster because of the way parents scare the hell out of their kids in regards to sex. The point here was that because female marijuana users were more likely to have premarital sex, his bride-to-be would have had more experience in the sack had she tried it, thus allowing him to penetrate her before 6am the night of the ceremony.

Finally, yet another girl lauds the benefits, saying her first pot helped her relax enough to have her first sex and first black (guy) in the lone interracial scene of the bunch.

ATSSOM is interesting and informative. But it’s not really porn in the classic sense. Still, there is enough nudity, disco bush and young John Holmes to keep your attention during the course of this documentary. If you want to learn some nuggets of weed wisdom today, but you don’t want to sacrifice images of retro pussy, then you’ve come to the right place.

Stars:   Fiorello LaGuardia Billy Curtis John Holmes Levi Richards Sandy Dempsey Carol Dempsey Suzanne Fields Maria Aronoff Andy Bellamy Patti Lee Billy Lane Lynn Holmes Harry J. Anslinger

Categories: Classic 70’s Gold All Sex

Running Time:   77 minutes

Released:   02/1971

Studio Name:   Impulse

Director:   Dennis Van Zak

Award-Winning Movies

The Devil in Miss JonesAwards season has finally ended for the year in Hollywood, but we’re never tired of talking about quality porn. You’ve heard about the award-winning movies from the last couple of years – titles such as this year’s AVN champion “Speed,” and other recent winners including “Deviance” and the popular, weirdly hot animated feature “Pornomation 3.” Then there are undisputed classics that predate AVN, the kind of movies even those who don’t watch porn have heard of: perennial bestseller “Debbie Does Dallas,” masterful porn-art fusion “The Devil in Miss Jones,” and big-natural-tit classic “Deep Inside Annie Sprinkle.” But there are many award-winning porn flicks deserving of more love; here are some from the last four decades.

Made in 1979, “Talk Dirty to Me” won the 1980 Best Film award from the Adult Film Association of America. This movie proves it’s possible to combine a good plot with hot sex. It’s a tale of seduction Talk Dirty to Mecarried out as only the late, great John Leslie could do: dirty-talking, rough around the edges, sometimes aggressive, but irresistible to many women – particularly to beautiful housewife Jessie St. James. She’s been craving the kind of filthy-mouthed fuck he dishes out, and while her prudish but loving husband is away, she becomes putty in John’s hands. The women in this film fall for his lines because he’s the master at his best. It will remind you of what it was like before plastic surgery was common, and there’s plenty of bush for body hair enthusiasts to enjoy. “Talk Dirty to Me” is a must-see for fans of late ’70s porn and couples who want something different. This highly-charged erotic classic was the first in a series that launched other great movies, including the 1985 AVN Best Film Award winner “Talk Dirty to Me 3.”

When the AVN Awards began in 1984, “Puss ‘n Boots” took the Best Screenplay – Film trophy Puss 'n Boots(yes, pornos have screenplays). Follow the randy adventures of Puss (Kelly Nichols), a hell-raising Army private who’s doing everything she can to get discharged. She tries to get knocked up, but finds out her would-be baby daddy has had a vasectomy. Next Puss tries to get discharged as a conscientious objector, but is transferred to the typing pool. Finally, Puss fakes insanity in hopes of being given a Section Eight, but ends up with a medal when she scares away a group of biker chicks looking for a fight. Along the way, we see that the women in the barracks are horny broads, into things like voyeurism, lesbian shower action, and kinky sex. Genuinely funny and hot, “Puss ‘n Boots” is like an X-rated, female “Stripes.” Video X Pix has brought this and many other adult classics back to life, including “Roommates,” another “sex and the single girl” classic starring Kelly Nichols (and the 1982 winner of “Best Film” from the Adult Film Association of America). You won’t see a more frank and unblinking depiction of female sexuality in the ’80s.

Dog WalkerWe’ve already praised John Leslie as an actor, but as a director he brought us one of the best adult films of the 1990s. “Dog Walker” was shot on film and earned many awards, from Best Director and Best Couples Sex Scene – Film at the 1995 AVN Awards to XRCO’s Best Film of the Year. Steven St. Croix is jewel thief Tito, who’s pissed off the mob and must pay. He’s beaten up and forced to watch other men fuck his wife, Kristi Lynn, who informs him that the mob owns her and he was only renting her. Meanwhile, Tito sees surreal visions of a beautiful woman in black, often walking a dog. It’s the stunning Christina Angel, who remains unobtainable as he struggles through an erotic maze and watches her fuck other men. By the time they consummate their attraction in the highly sensual, award-winning scene, it’s too late for Tito to save himself. Don’t expect the hardcore sex of today’s rougher standards, but this is a classic that any fan of feature porn should see.

Breakin' 'Em In 12In 2006, AEBN introduced the VOD Awards to recognize movies that fans voted on with their dollars. The winners of these trophies are the movies fans have viewed the most, so if you trust what’s popular with fellow porn lovers more than you trust awards committees, then you’ll be interested to know that, for example, “Breakin’ ‘Em In 12” was the Best Gonzo Movie 2010 (released in 2009). This comes as no surprise given that box cover girl Tanner Mayes is one of the hottest young babes in the biz and won the VOD Awards’ Best Newcomer award that year. Best Overall Movie 2010 was “White Mommas,” an all-sex interracial flick starring such hall of fame MILFs as Ginger Lynn and Lisa Ann. You can see all the winners from this year and every year back to 2006 at the official VOD Awards site.

Pussy Talk

The study of philosophy tells us that when you define something, its opposite also becomes true. So, if there exists something called hot, there must exist the opposite of hot, or cold. If there exists fast, there must also exist slow. If there exists big, there must also exist small. You get the point.

In 1972, the film Deep Throat defined the fact that a woman’s clitoris could reside in her throat. That means that somewhere there must exist the opposite of that. But what is the opposite of a clitsophagus? Apparently it’s a blabgina. Released in 1975, Pussy Talk stars Penelope LaMour as Joelle, a woman who discovers that within her second pair of lips resides a very opinionated, very sharp-tongued entity. The main problem with this set up (as if loquacious labia weren’t bad enough) is that the entity has no filter and a poor sense of timing, which makes for all kinds of awkward social interactions. Of course, because it’s porn, they all lead to sexual encounters, which is good for the you, the viewer.

The classic scene in this one is the dinner party where Joelle’s pussy gets bored and decides to take matters into its own hands – by using Joelle’s hands on itself. There she sits, solitary, in plain view on the couch, running her finger through her hairy slit. Talk about a party foul (and possibly two if you’re opposed to hairy snatches.) As Joelle’s friskiness hogs the g-spotlight, everyone suddently stops to watch the spectacle. Her hubby Eric (Nils Hortzs) is understandably horrified and starts to doubt his ability to satisfy her.

He calls in a shrink (Ellen Earl), but Joelle’s slit siren begins talking smack to the good doctor. It’s persuasive ways lead to shock on the part of the shrink and to part of the shrink being shocked – namely with a thorough ass fucking from Eric. After that, she approaches Joelle and temporarily appeases the pompous pussy with a good licking.

From here, the film takes a decidedly strange and more sexual turn. Thanks to a press conference by the doctor, word about Joelle circulates around town and she becomes more or less a circus freak in the eyes of the general public. To escape the attention, she and Eric retreat to her childhood home where she begins to have flashbacks of her youth. Beatrice Harnois plays the young Joelle as she recounts abuse suffered at the hands of her step-father; trying to lose her virginity to her boyfriend only to give it up to a Pinocchio marionette (a must-see); fucking her high school teacher; and seducing her priest at confessional.

When a sleazy reporter (Vicky Messica) discovers her whereabouts, Joelle takes refuge at her Aunt Barbara’s (Sylvia Bourbon). However, the reporter, who desperately seeks an interview with Joelle’s pussy, pays Barbara off to get access. When Joelle recovers from her sedation, she goes home where Eric fucks the entity out of her. However, the act has a very, very strange result. As per usual, you must watch to find out what transpires. What we can tell you that it’s very wacky and it spawned a sequel.

Pussy Talk is fun and entertaining, but also very sexy. It’s one of the truly great films in all of adult cinema, not just the French side of things. It won the Grand Prize at the first and only International Porn Film Festival in Paris during the summer of 1975. Unfortunately, in an attempt to clamp down on porn, European governments levied hefty taxes on filmmakers and production houses forcing massive budget cuts. Projects that began as ambitious endeavors often ended up as back alley afterthoughts.

It’s a damn shame, really.

Stars:   Penelope LaMour Sylvia Bourbon Beatrice Harnois Ellen Earl Nils Hortzs Vicky Messica Claude Dupont

Categories: Euro Feature Classic International Adult Humor 70’s Gold Parody

Running Time:   87 minutes

Released:   11/1975

Studio Name:   ALPHA-FRANCE

Series:   Pussy Talk

Director:   Frederic Lansac

Sex Games for Couples

When married couples’ sex lives get boring there are two ways to handle the situation. The first way is to look in the mirror. Only boring people get bored, and once they come to grips with what they see looking back at them, they can revamp their sexcapades into anything they want and possibly fix the situation. The second way is to look for something more exciting outside the relationship and far away from reflective surfaces. We won’t even bother to touch on what can go wrong here. You’d need many, many hours of free time. Plus, we don’t have enough tiny letters after our names to indicate professional credibility and status to adequately break it all down in this blog. Use your imagination.

There is, however, a third way. Both parties in the relationship can set up an arrangement to mess around with other people. Such is the situation in Sex Games for Couples, another classic of French adult cinema released by Alpha-France. Directed by Georges Fleury, the film centers on two different couples going about the daily grind as they normally do. The problem is that the daily grind no longer has much daily grind, if you get what we’re after here. They still love one another as you can generally tell, but though the oven works, the pilot light has gone out.

One guy (Guy Royer) has what seems like an endless string of hot secretaries, blondes, brunettes, redheads, whatever you want, at his beck and call. In fact, the first babe (Chantal Nora) he bangs during his nooner at the office is the wife of the other husband (Charlie Schreiner). What’s great about these chicks is they are all exhibitionists to a large degree, thriving on the threat of getting caught.

As we mentioned, the first woman loves office fucking. The second tryst is a lovely “real” redhead if you’re worried about matching drapes and carpets in the den, or in the car as is the case here. She machetes a vibrator through her ruby pubes, getting off while sucking his cock. She even rolls the pulsating device over the head of his cock while jacking him. It’s something that isn’t seen these days, but something that maybe ought to be brought back. The brunette sucks and fucks him in plain view on the observation deck of their office building.

Despite the sexual aggravations and the rather open arrangements agreed upon by the couples, jealousies flare. In the case of the first girl (Daniele Troeger), she hires a live-in maid (Dawn Cumming) as a way to entice her hubby to stay home and stop his constant meetings, and maybe give her a little attention too. Daniele creeps into the attic where her husband and Dawn are fucking and she opens her shirt to fondle her breasts and finger her hairy pussy. The following morning the three of them engage in a ménage, with Daniele forcing her tongue into Dawn’s lovely wet crease and jamming a finger into her ass while she fucks Guy’s cock on top.

As the film progresses and the affairs continue, Daniele’s husband has begun to pay more attention to her, so she calls it off with her lover Charlie. They agree to be friends, and as a kind gesture, Charlie invites Daniele and Guy over to his house for a party. That is where the secrets they all have been keeping are finally revealed. Will it end up bringing the couples closer together or will it drive a permanent wedge between them?

Watch Sex Games for Couples and find out.

Stars:   Dawn Cummings Guy Royer Charlie Schreiner Chantal Nora Muriel Troeger Catherine Ferre

Categories: Euro Feature Natural Breasts Classic International 70’s Gold

Running Time:   73 minutes

Released:   11/1977

Studio Name:   ALPHA-FRANCE

Director:   Georges Fleury

Debbie Does Dallas

Debbie Does Dallas is arguably the most well-known and endearing classic film in porn history. We’ll use the term “arguably” here because there are others, like Deep Throat, that could conceivably make the claim. But it would be hard to find an adult film that has so captured the hearts and minds of the porn-watching public and the attention of so many others as much as this film. You don’t have to like or know anything about the NBA to recognize the name Michael Jordan and if you were to ask anyone – anyone – on the street (as long as they are 18 or older) they’ll have at least heard of Debbie Does Dallas.

So what is it about this film?

For starters, one of the benchmarks of a great film is box office success. DDD is one of the top five grossing porn flicks of all time. At one point, it was estimated to have pulled in $250,000 per week per screen at the theaters in which it was showing. (Yes, porn used to show in theaters way back when.) Once the home video market took flight, DDD was all but assured its rightful place in film history.

Second, it’s not a stretch to suggest that, for thousands upon thousands of male Generation X-ers, DDD was their first introduction to sex. The mere mention of the title, for many, will have associated with it fond adolescent memories of sneaking into dad’s closet or big brother’s room to smuggle a copy down to the basement to gawk, cringe, giggle and get corrupted by images and situations they had until that point only heard about, dreamt about or imagined.

Next, DDD was filmed in the seventies, the disco era. Neanderthalic-looking mustachios were in, as were unwieldy collars, polyester, poofy locks and poorly-designed graphics. It’s a kitschy time capsule of all things inexplicable, part of its innate charm. Further, this particular decade was still not too far removed from the Sexploitation era, where filmmakers pushed the envelope to see what they could get away with. It is here that Deep Throat could lay claim to the porn throne for its runaway success and its opening of doors for pure hardcore, but DDD honed the formula with better pacing, humor and plot than its predecessor. Considering hardcore was something entirely new, DDD made a stronger impression in people’s minds than films that would come later. Firsts of anything tend to do that. And helping the reminiscent qualities of the film too is the high school setting, a time of discovery that is universal to most, where teenage boys and girls learned about themselves and about each other. There was innocence and ill repute. There were raging hormones, pairings, break-ups, confusion, crushes on teachers, and a growing rebelliousness to authority. It’s easily identifiable emotion and it’s all here. Films like DDD are the tripwire that floods the thoughts with strong feelings of nostalgia and memories of a time when life was easy. Toss in the sequels, remakes, Broadway productions and the cyclical nature of art and fashion and entire new generations of fans are always being introduced to the phenomenon that is DDD, helping to foster its ongoing legacy.

And then there’s this: the continuing mystery surrounding the disappearance of the film’s enigmatic star, Bambi Woods. After all these years, it still resonates. She vanished, seemingly from the face of the earth, after only four films. She is alleged to have succumbed to a drug overdose in 1986, though there are plenty of theories and conjecture that conflict with that account. To this day, no concrete evidence exists that Ms. Woods is dead…or alive. Years of rampant speculation have brought a mythical quality to an already legendary film.

What about the film itself?

The plot is rather simple. Debbie Benton gets the call up to the bigs to become a Texas Cowgirl cheerleader. There is, however, one major snag. She will have to raise the travel money all by her lonesome as her parents are not too keen on the idea, calling her dreams “outdoor burlesque”. The rest of the girls on her current squad decide they will chip in to help raise the funds, but they have only two weeks to do so. Hatched in the girls’ locker room after cheerleader practice, the plan is to get part-time jobs after school. They form a collective called Teen Services offering up their time at the library, record store, tennis pro-shop, candle shop, or wherever they have connections. There are to be no dates with their football-playing boyfriends during this time as they are up against the clock. But, like many of the best laid plans, these too go astray.

As they undertake their jobs, the girls soon realize that they are busting their butts only to see little scratch in return – that is, except for Debbie. She has discovered both power and empowerment at the sporting goods store where she works. Her boss, Mr. Greenfield (Richard Balla), is more than willing to throw money at her just for a look, touch or suckle of her beautiful tits. Her discovery perks up a glum locker room and it is at that point they realize there are other ways of making a lot more money a lot more quickly. What transpires during the film makes for some of the more unforgettable scenes in the annals of adult cinema.

There is the shower scene.

The boyfriends aren’t too thrilled about the loss of date night, so they have to make hay while the sun shines. Roberta’s (Christy Ford a.k.a. Misty Winters) boyfriend (David Morris) and his buddies join her and Pat (Kasey Rodgers) in the showers after practice. Roberta performs oral sex, rides CG and gets fucked doggie. Sexy red-headed Pat gets drilled in mish on the tile floor and gets cum spurted onto her back and ass, all of it done to a soundtrack that resembles a Curtis Mayfield/70s game show theme mash-up. After that, there is a threesome including some tight penetration shots in spoon position followed by a tight cumshot and an even better one onto her cheek and into her mouth courtesy of Herschel Savage.

There is the candle scene.

Roberta is at the candle shop when her boyfriend Tom calls on the private line. They miss each other terribly on account of the no sex pact and Roberta can’t keep from fondling her breasts as she talks. She promises to meet him at dance class the following day. Meanwhile, the thought of their meeting has her worked into a frenzy. She unbuttons her skirt, unsnaps the crotch of her panties and begins to masturbate in the shop, her fingers sliding across her wet pussy lips and thick bush. In one of the all-time classic moments, she takes a nearby candle and fucks herself like it was a dildo. Of course, her employer, Mrs. Hardwick (Robyn Byrd), catches her in the act. At first she is indignant, asking Roberta if this is what she is paying her for, but quickly recants and apologizes. As Roberta tries to save face by throwing on her clothes, Mrs. Hardwick inches closer, relaying that she understands how everyone has his own “thing”. For the Hardwicks, that thing happens to be voyeurism. Mr. Hardwick (Eric Edwards) fucks Roberta in mish on a sectional as the Mrs. fingers her own clit. He pulls out, cumming onto Roberta’s foot and into Mrs. Hardwick’s open mouth. She proceeds to licks up any wayward drops.

There is the car wash scene.

Annie (Jenny Cole) and Rikki (Sherri Tart) have agreed to wash cars to raise their portion of the funds. When they show up at Mr. Bradly’s (David Sutton) residence, he is not home. They decide to wash it anyway and jet around back to get the washing supplies. Between the two of them, they suspect they can get 100 bucks flashing their tits. Mr. Bradly arrives home and insists they change out of their wet clothes. To do it in front of him is $10 bucks a piece. Of course, seeing their natural tits and full bush brings out his animal side. For $25 more, they allow him to smother them in kisses. He runs his tongue down Annie’s youthful body and slips it into her hairy pussy. Rikki moves in and sucks his hard dick. At this point, he doesn’t care what the cost, he needs them both right this minute. They tag team his tower, slowly sucking his swollen head and licking his balls. Annie take it in the ass from behind and Rikki jacks the cum from his dick onto Annie’s crack and licks it up. There is no afterglow here as the wife comes home earlier than expected. The girls sprint upstairs grabbing their still sopping duds off the olive green shag carpet and make a quick exit.

There is the library scene.

Donna’s (Merle Michaels) boyfriend, Tim, bumps into her on campus and desperately wants to see her. She’s on her way to the library and says she’ll call him later, but he can’t bear it anymore, so he sneaks into the library during her shift for some alone time. She shows him some of the moves she’s learned. Just like football, he goes long and she hits him on a deep route, slurping on his member and jacking him onto her mouth and cheek. File that under the gooey decimal system. Mr. Biddle, Donna’s boss, catches them in the act and sends her to his office. She begs him not to contact the parents and he agrees, though he thinks she needs a good spanking. He knows just the one to administer them: him. He’s wise to their little company, but unwittingly becomes a client anyway when he realizes Donna will do anything to avoid the parental wrath. He hikes up her skirt, pulls down her panties and spanks her bottom, causing her ass to turn red and his wallet to become lighter.

There is the sauna scene.

Lisa (Gerogette Sanders) has been working at the tennis club, but has started to get noticed by the male patrons because she doesn’t wear undies under that cute outfit. She services two guys in the sauna after their match, sucking off one guy and taking another from behind.

There is the record store scene.

Tammy’s (Arcadia Lake) has been lagging behind the others in money generation, but it’s because she doesn’t like record shop Tony and his advances. Lisa arrives at just the right time with a proposal for Tony and to offer some comfort to Lisa. Lisa goes down on Tony and then offers up his cock to Tammy, who samples his head like it’s a piece of hard candy. The flavor is so sweet she sucks the entire length. Lisa puts the finishing touches on the scene enticing Tony to cum onto Tammy’s tiny little tits.

And there is Debbie’s scene.

Debbie is told by Mr. Greenfield that he will pay for her and all of the girls to go to Texas if she’s willing to do whatever he asks. She relents, arriving at the store in her Texas Cowgirl outfit. He emerges from the changing room in a football outfit, though as his dangling cock suggests, he forgot his cup and jock strap. He has always fantasized about being team captain and fucking the head cheerleader. Debbie’s already got the head part down rolling her tongue over his erect shaft. He strips her out of her short shorts and pries apart her pussy lips, fingering her clit and punching his tongue across her bushy goal line. He fucks her mish and doggie then appropriately enough in cowgirl on a gym mat. In the lattermost position, there are some nice shots of her ass sliding up and down his cock and his fingers exploring around her asshole. She cums hard and he sprays a huge stream of cum onto her belly while she jacks his cock. Touchdown!

If there’s a criticism of this film, it’s that the women are “ugly” and the fucking is way too vanilla. By today’s standards the fucking argument is debatable, but only if taken out of context. Again, this was not too far removed from the Sexploitation and soft-core eras. For its day, DDD was over the top. As for the ugly factor, you have to understand that this was the seventies. People weren’t as hung up about their looks as they are today. Further, there were no contract stars and the talent was paid a pittance compared to the six-figure salaries of some of today’s top performers. How many of you could honestly say you would fuck on film, when porn was not as accepted as the fact of life as it is today, risking your reputation, all for a few measly bucks? A smaller talent pool means a lesser number of “hot” women from which to choose. That said, beauty, as everyone knows, is in the eye of the beholder. There are PLENTY of guys who like women to look like regular women, bodies clear of tats and silicone, with bush, 11-16% body fat, and no artificial in-fem-ination of any kind.

Regardless of what anybody thinks, Debbie Does Dallas has etched its place in history as one of the all-time greats. As always watch it for yourself and make your own judgments.

Stars:   Bambi Woods Georgette Sanders Rikki O’Neil Christy Ford Kasey Rodgers Jack Teague Tony Mansfield Ben Pierce Jenny Cole David Sutton Steve Marshall Paula Head Pat Allure Debbie Lewis Peter Lerman Arcadia Lake Robyn Byrd Eric Edwards Herschel Savage David Morris Merle Michaels Richard Bolla

Categories: Feature Teen Classic Cheerleader 70′s Gold Award Winning Movies

Running Time:   84 minutes

Released:   01/1978

Studio Name:   VCX Home of the Classics

Series:   Debbie Does Dallas

Director:   Jim Clark